Friday, September 5, 2008

Celebrity Hockey Mom

The weird, wild and wondrous roll out of Sara Palin was the highlight of the Republican convention. After a rocky beginning Sara pumped out a great speech that was music to the right wings ears. The image managers of the Republican Party did an excellent job. Many of the pundit class are now singing praises for Palin.

But what really happened in the twin cities? The initial roll out of Palin was so disastrous, it set the bar so low. that Sara would have to be a world champion limbo performer to go underneath it. Palin would have to have laterally tripped over herself and collapsed on the lecture like Chevy Chase to fail her speech. She did not, she practice the speech for five hours prior to reading it off the Teleprompters.

But to quote the X-files “the truth is out there.” While the Republican Party has unleashed a horde of lawyers on the 49th state there are just not enough lawyers to prevent the dirt from escaping. Take Troopergate for instance. It is a juicy story of revenge, skulduggery and just general weirdness. At base it is the story of a messy celebrity divorce. Make no mistake Sara Palin is now a certified, died-in-the-wool celebrity.

Palin is story ripe for the tabloids. A out-of-nowhere politician gets plucked by a war hero to be a heart-beat away from the presidency. That she is knock-dead gorgeous after delivering five children is just an extra added bonus. Extra points for the quirky cute names of the children, more points for her last child being a downs-syndrome baby. The whole family is so dang telegenic they should be banned for life. And that is their Achilles heel. They are just too dang perfect.

For now the masses are oohing and ahing at this cute collection but it is early in the game. The National Enquire is already dumpster-diving into the lives and loves of the Palin family. The oldest teen-aged daughter had the bad form to end up pregnant and that little fact became front page news. Piper Palin’s pregnancy (love the alliteration) is now part of the our insatiable need for gossip.

Now that the Palins have entered the tabloid consciousness they are going to find out getting out of trailer park is going to much more difficult then they ever imagined. The Republicans pleas of “privacy” are sooner or later going to fall on deaf ears. There is just too much juicy scandal to be mined in the mountains of Alaska. This going to be a repeat of the Klondike gold rush.

As the trash gets revealed the Republican strategy of keeping the sharks of the media away from Palin’s bleeding body is going to fail. Sooner or later either Palin or McCain has some ‘splainin’ to do. Republicans want to run on narrative, but the narrative that is Palin is an eventual looser. She fits the Britney Spears / Lindsay Lohan mold a little too easily.
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